Retire phone extensions just like ballplayer numbers. They did it for Ruth, Mantle, Mays. Why not guys like us? Pete, ext. 236–we salute you!
That’s just one of the many ideas Mens Health has put together that they feel would make a perfect world.
– More rollover options. Cell phone minutes and vacation days are fine. But let us bank other important stuff. Politeness? “I let you cut in yesterday. Today you wait.” Crunches? “Did ’em for a month. I’m taking the next 6 off.”
– A 10 percent discount when self-checking out at the grocery store. C’mon, throw us this bone if we’re making less work for the people who actually get paid to be there.
– Built-in bottle openers on cardboard six-pack containers. It works for crayon boxes with the sharpener. No more broken glass or broken teeth. No more searching for a fence.
– Tollbooths that double as can redemption centers. Empties are worth a nickel. Now, you can pay and recycle.
– A court mandate that all waitresses call you “honey.” The ultimate: “Here’s your hot towel, honey.”
Photo by g-point.
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